It’s time to accept reality. Winter (sigh) is here. Goodbye sunburns and June Beetles. Hello snow blowers and winter tires.
It’s that time again. The time we trade our flip flops for Sorel winter boots, tank tops for North Face jackets, and short shorts for snow pants.
That’s fine- in January.
This past weekend, Winnipeg was dumped with snow. No, not the kind you see in a snow globe. I’m talking The Day After Tomorrow kind of snow.
On Sunday, I got stuck in my driveway-three times. I crawled under my car to clear snow from behind the tires–also three times. This resulted in wet pants-the first stages of potty training all over again. I slid down Portage Avenue like I was on a Slip ‘n’ Slide, minus the bubbles. And I arrived at my destination 35 minutes late.
Waking up 20 minutes early to scrape ice off you car is tedious.
Frost bite doesn’t look good on anyone.
Your socks always get stuck in your boots after taking them off.
Walking to school is a treacherous journey.
No matter how much you laugh at yourself, slipping on black ice is always embarrassing.
Zippers get stuck on your parka.
Outside, your nose runs a marathon.
You can’t text with mittens on.
You sigh with relief every time your car starts.
Shoveling hurts your back.
However, living above the equator has its perks, such as:
Snow days when you have a test.
Tuques knit by your grandmother.
The Fireplace Channel.
Skiing and snowboarding are good for your glutes.
A snowman melting is sign of spring.
Don’t get me wrong I love Canada- seven months out of the year. However, every time the temperature drops to -40°C, I consider migrating south or buying a new pair of long johns.